100 Things About Me

1. I spend most of my day in front of a computer.
2. I do not have an appendix. It was removed in 7th grade.
3. I’ve never broken a bone.
4. I hate stubbing my toe, I’d rather break it.
5. I’m afraid of low-heights. Anything that could severely hurt but not kill me.
6. My recurring dream when I was 5 or 6 was flying over Staten Island and my kindergarten teacher was floored as I flew overhead.
7. I’ve performed in a play at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival in Scotland.
8. I’ve performed in a play at the NYC Fringe Festival.
9. The first band I was in was called “The Flames” in 6th grade and we had two songs. A cover of “Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band” and one original “Party Girl”. We had one drummer, one keyboardist and 5 vocalists. We were unaware of the heavy homoerotic undertones.
10. The second band I was in was called “Oralgroove”. We were unaware of the heavy nerdy undertones.
11. I used to have a real hard time whistling when I was younger. In fact, when I was cast in “The King and I” one of my biggest moments was whistling, “Whistle A Happy Tune.” Someone had to do it from offstage.
12. I have an identical (supposedly) twin brother, Jon.
13. In high school I set the then-record-setting bid for the senior servant auction. I was sold to the highest bidder for $500 plus dollars.
14. I created my first user interface at the age of 12 for the Renegade BBS system. I designed it using strictly ANSI graphics.
15. I designed my first HTML website when I was 14 in 1994. Our website for our video production company, “The 3 Guyz” (with a z, instead of an s) was a pretty popular stop on the web for teens and was featured in numerous web magazines. A big feature at the time was my section on RENT that confused most users into thinking they were at the OFFICIAL Rent site.
16. I told my Dad to buy AOL stock in 1991. He told me it would be just like Prodigy.
17. I told my Dad to buy Google stock for the IPO. He didn’t have a good excuse and still didn’t buy it.
18. My grandfather fought in the Civil War. His name was Christian Neuber and I used to be real into the civil war when I was 11.
19. I was born in Brooklyn, NY and moved to Staten Island, NY until I was 6 when we moved to Jersey. I now reside in Upstate NY.
20. My first crush was on Melanie Spellacy in nursery school.
21. My first celeb crush was on Fergie when she was on “Kids Incorporated” when I was 6 or 7.
22. I also used to have a crush on my cousin when I was 6 before I realized that was icky. She’s also my first cousin, so does that count?
23. I once wet the bed after a really vivid dream about using a urinal. I was 25 years old and in bed with my girlfriend at the time.
24. I always have to pee on roller coasters on the way up to the first drop. I also always have to pee as soon as I get in the shower.
25. I cannot stand it when people talk during movies.
26. Once when I thought I lost a toy when i was 5, I found it in the living room and ran to bring it back upstairs and ran straight into a wall and passed out.
27. I used to have seizures when I was younger and a few times I envisioned strange people standing in my kitchen. My Mom freaked out.
28. I once thought I caught Santa Claus delivering presents when we set up a tape recorder. Now that I think about it, he spent an awful lot of time jingling his bells and saying, “Ho Ho Hooo!”
29. One night a few weeks after Jon and I were born and living in Brooklyn, my Mom awoke and told my Dad that we needed to go to the new house in Staten Island. It was the middle of the night and my Dad said no, but she insisted. We left for Staten Island and camped out in the unfinished house much to my Dad’s dismay. Later that night, lightning struck the Brooklyn house and came in through the window setting the couch on fire. The same couch that Jon and I were sleeping on earlier in the evening. The whole house burned down and the cat died in the fire.
30. My Mom also woke up one night and told my Dad a series of numbers in her head. They went to the track that day and won a couple grand.
31. My Mom also used to tell me she worked for the circus when I was a kid. I found out it was a lie when I was 16.
32. I was nearly arrested for driving without a license when I was 15. Jon got arrested instead.
33. My kindergarten teacher told my Mom that I was the one of the most flirtatious students she’s ever had. She was 70 years old. And I wasn’t flirting with her.
34. I am a slave to technology.
35. My penmanship is atrocious.
36. I believe in UFOs, but not God.
37. I play a lot of poker and run poker tournaments in Upstate NY.
38. My brother owns a gym and I’m still chubby
39. If I won the lottery the first thing I’d buy is a new computer.
40. I think that Radiohead is the best band on the planet and down the road they will be hailed as the band of my generation.
41. I am upset I never really learned to play an instrument. It was my own fault. No one ever told me that chicks would dig it.
42. I am a graphic and web designer but can’t draw anything by hand.
43. I was once stalked in the mail by a pedophile when I was featured in a local newspaper article when I was 9. He sent me letters with pictures of his gennies (which I never saw). My Mom got wind of these suspicious letters and they were forwarded to the FBI. They interviewed me when I was younger but it took a while for me to realize exactly what was going on.
44. I was also interrogated by the DA’s office and the FBI for about 5 hours when I was 21 in connection with a kidnapping case. I was cleared of all charges.
45. I wasn’t allowed to watch MTV and R rated movies when I was younger. I used to have to sneak over friends houses to watch it.
46. I have an extreme aversion to mushrooms.
47. I saw my first nude woman (besides my Mom) on the fridge in my Uncle’s (by marriage) garage. He had magnets covering her “bathing suit areas.” They were very easy to move and replace.
48. I was suspended the last full day of junior year for “conspiring to steal the Spanish 4 Final.” Conspiring? I stole the test from the filing cabinet and gave it to a friend who passed it around school. He actually never gave me a copy so I was one of the only ones who didn’t use it.
49. I sing whenever I’m alone.
50. YES, my twin brother and I used to switch classes and fool the teachers when we were younger. YES, we kind of pulled that trick on a girl too. And NO, I cannot feel it when you punch him. But give it a shot anyway.
51. I still feel really bad about asking a girl out as a prank senior year of high school. I said, “Robin, would you like to go out sometime?” And she replied, “Yes, I would.” Then I said, “Baaaaaaaahhhhh!” I’m sorry Robin.
52. My first kiss was in 4th grade with Rachel Zigman. Later that year she consulted a panel of 5 year olds whom she was baby sitting to see if we should break up or not. All the girls said, “Yes” and the one boy said, “No.” Majority ruled I guess
53. I’ve only cheated on one girl in my life. It was in 7th grade and I left her several messages that we needed to talk so I could break up with her and hook up with Nicole Fennel. She didn’t call me back quickly enough, and I wasn’t missing out on that.
54. I used to tell my Dad that my twin brother was gay when I was in high school. He’d get pissed and one day he told me that genetics said if that was the case, I was likely to be gay too. I stopped immediately.
55. I’m fairly lazy. And I also understate, constantly.
56. I love my job, which is a rarity.
57. I miss my friends and family every day.
58. If I had to go back and do it all over again I’d make some substantial changes.
59. I’ve prayed to God only a few times and it didn’t work.
60. I cry more out of frustration than sadness.
61. People think I tend to be a bit crude.
62. I once had a teacher who would dock us points if we used the word “like” in a sentence at all. Even if it was when you were comparing something.
63. My best friend used to correct me when I said that I “Did Good on a test.” He’d always say, “Well. You did well.” And now I find myself correcting others.
64. My first foray into filmmaking were short stop animation flicks when I was 7 or 8 years old. We’d set our Playmobil characters up and shoot the movie. It would take days to shoot.
65. I went to a specialized High School for half the day of senior year to take a video production class.
66. I don’t like to take over the counter drugs unless its an emergency.
67. I will not apply ketchup to my food. However, if its on there already, I will eat it and enjoy it. See #55.
68. I miss fixins bars at Roy Rogers.
69. I love pickles. Especially on Tuna. There is also an annual pickle festival in the township I reside in. Coincidence? Actually, yes.
70. I love being the center of attention.
71. I get calls about computer problems from friends or family at least 3 times a week.
72. I decided NOT to work at Geek Squad (Best Buy) because they said the tie and nerd glasses were not a requirement while on the job.
73. I used to work at a laser tag place in my teens. I got pretty good and used to run private matches.
74. My first job was selling troll dolls at the Englishtown Flea Market when I was 9. I would spend all my earnings on baseball cards.
75. My favorite baseball team is the New York Mets. I remember them winning the World Series when I was six and was at several games last season when they got close to the series again. In particular I was at the NLDS Game 2, NLCS Games 6 and (sigh) 7.
76. I used to play soccer when I was younger and also spent hours a day on a trampoline. Hence, my strong legs.
77. I jumped off the roof of my house onto my trampoline and my ass hit the ground hard. But I didn’t break my ass (or the trampoline).
78. Once I had sex in a jacuzzi that was set too hot. After getting out we both collapsed on the ground and couldn’t move for 10 minutes. Coincidently, I think my brother saw me having sex in the jacuzzi that night.
79. My friends still claim they saw my parents standing naked on our back deck one night after we’d been sexiled. I can’t picture my parents just hanging out naked on the deck. I just can’t.
80. I Google everything.
81. I try to tip well, except when I receive sub-standard service.
82. My ultimate goal is to live in or close to NYC.
83. I have some of the most unique and talented friends a person can amass and I appreciate them all.
84. I’ve never been skiing or snowboarding.
85. People often are confused and think I went to Rutgers. I get tired of explaining that I lived there, got parking tickets there, partied there and did plays at Cabaret Theatre there, but that I never attended the school. I just say, “Yes. I miss Rutgers.”
86. I’m happy 99% of the time. And I’m serious.
87. I still have trouble saving money.
88. I love to cook, but rarely do. See #55.
89. I love fish now. When I was younger my parents would keep salmon in the fridge and the milk would smell like it. But since I’ve started eating sushi, I’m a big salmon fan now.
90. My favorite food growing up was spinach. My parents were thrilled.
91. My Mom told me my brother’s first word was “Horsy” and that mine was “Helicopter”. She was lying again. It was probably, “Dada”.
92. My Mom lost her first child before we were born. We rarely talk about him but his name was Christian. My name is Chris and my brothers name is Jon. Say our names fast. Chris. Jon. ChrisJon. Hmmm…
93. I love to read but rarely find the time. If I start a book I usually finish it in a day or two.
94. I’m completely self-taught in graphic and web design. Whenever I don’t know an answer to something, I don’t ask anyone, I research it.
95. I have about 15 college credits. Do they expire?
96. I found this list a lot less daunting than I’d assumed.
97. I hope to leave a footprint in the sand of the internet one day; make a contribution that is important and meaningful.
98. I get very upset when people make fun of New Jersey. I am from Jersey and share the belief that it is the best state in the Union. (Aside from property taxes and Elizabeth, of course.)
99. I made more money when I was 20 than I do now.
100. My middle name is Albert.